Did I get that?

I am never positively sure if what I mean is what you get or what you mean is what I understand.

Lately I’ve been noticing how often I misunderstand others. I recently realized that the emotional content, and my attention to them, can shut down understanding and comprehension about what someone is attempting to tell me. Emotional and biological dynamics can simply draw my attention away from the exchange and into the stream of thought. After some contemplation I fell back onto the two things I know are important in any exchange.

Both being present and paying attention open the possibility for trust and communion. Paying attention without the need to establish any social position or prove anything projects the signal I am here, I see and acknowledge you, and am receiving what you are attempting to say. And that doesn’t mean I will always understand, comprehend, or agree with what’s stated. But sends the signal I am in attention to the moments we occupy. I am as fully here with you as possible.

It’s interesting because there is no sense of “trying” to understand, there is a simple and direct focus on being in proximity of body and breath, and focusing attention on the other person. It seems that it opens up a clearer arena for reception. I may still not catch what’s being transmitted, but I’m also offering a blank surface for the other person to write upon. Later, when contemplating, I have a better chance to comprehend because there is only the message devoid of any additional opinions, conclusions, feelings, or justifications.

This is proving to be an interesting process and perhaps will become clearer as it evolves.

Treasure each moment,

Bryan Wagner

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