Conditioned mind relies on the story of past and future to give it time to fabricate stories about past and future. It cannot survive in the moment. There is not enough time for it to manifest. In the moment our truthful nature exists. All those things we want to be we are right now. How long does it take to formulate a thought? If your attention is present there is no time to formulate a thought about alternate places and past events.
We spend so much of our time in other places in the mind. We interact with other people, places and things in the mind. We are hero’s and villains, defenders and aggressors, good and bad, desired and shunned, suffering or happy, all inside our minds and completely running over the moment we are in.
It’s not good or bad. I think my rationale is that when I am in past and future, conditioned mind has the tendency to build scenarios in which the “I” suffers. After all, that’s what it’s always trying to do. That way my ego can be the suffering center of the universe where it always longs to be.
After spending years looking for a solution, usually in seriously wrong places, (drugs, alcohol, assorted shit) I returned to the idea of Zen and Meditation. I like Zen. It has no description despite all the books and is clearly related to Tao. Tao is the other thing I love. Again there is no description that can be accurate. It’s like trying to describe anything that is everything. Meditation because I get to look at my own inner workings. You don’t need Zen or formal meditation, they are not the only processes.
Read ” A Life of One’s Own” by Marion Milner. I wish I could have met her. She dug in and asked herself questions and stayed with it for 7 years to get answers. I have so much respect for her.
So find a way if you are inclined to spend more time engaged around now. I noticed a change in how I treated others and myself. Know what? I like that change.